1434H

Alhamdulillah syukur tak terhingga diberi peluang untuk menyambut kedatangan Ramadan sekali lagi. I think it is not too late to wish everybody Salam Ramadan!! ;D Since i didn't do well last year, this year I'll do my best. Buat sehabis daya untuk buat Ramadan tahun ini bermakna. I bet this year's Ramadan will be so fast & can't believe now is already the tenth day! 

I don't know why but this Ramadan brought me back to Ramadan 2011 a lot. I've been reminiscing 2011 Ramadan lately and I realize I miss those moments. Tahun lepas tak rasa mcm ni. Langsung tak. Mungkin byk benda yg berlaku lately yg similar to what happened in 2011. But apa yang berlaku?

So that year, Mia & me decided to berhijrah together after dapat hidayah (cewah). Maybe atas kesedaran masing masing but bila aku suarakan rasa nak pakai tudung dekat dia, and she said she has been thinking abt the same thing too! Jadi excitednya Allah saja yang tahu. Hampir raya mcm tu, we both pakai tudung. I'm not sure if it was on the same day ke tak sbb tak rancang nak on the same day pun. 

Tapi kenapa tiba tiba teringat? Sebab ada sepasang best friend ni, (nama tak boleh bagitahu) berhijrah jugak & sama sama jugak & on Ramadan jugak! That make sense kan kalau tiba tiba aku teringat? I miss that year. The year yang tiba tiba rasa dosa banyak sangat berbakul bakul. Terasa bersalah bila ustazah mengajar and usik part sensitive (mengenai aurat & so on). Bila ustazah masuk kelas, excited nak belajar (I always hated Agama subject back then. Ampun ya Allah). Tapi bila dia ajar, terkena hidung sendiri haha! 

Honestly, pengajaran dia yang banyak buka hati ni nak berubah. Banyak beri kesan yang dalam. I thank Allah everyday for His hidayah and I pray everyday for Him to grant me His hidayah for every breath I take. And not to take it back from me. I'm happy the way I am now. Tak pernah menyesal pakai tudung bcs ramai yang rasa tak puas tunjuk rambut. But for me, aku menyesal tak hijrah awal awal. Takdir Allah, aku akur. 

1st July

Pejam celik pejam celik, it's July!!!!! My last post was on new year ya Allah I didn't remember I left my blog for half a year already! Ayat plg cliché, time flies so fast!!! Hahaha but srsly, I mean it. I can still remember vividly what I did last year. 

So lets recap how was my January to June now. Ok not really recap lah just a short short short conclusion. 2013 (january-june) has been a very very very very very tough year, ever. I have never been in such a tough year. I swear this is the toughest. But alhamdulillah I survived to July. 

Loads of things happened and living as a upper form student is hard. Superb hard. I wish I am fifteen again. Siapa ckp yg form 4 ni honeymoon year tu mmg aku salute habis sbb everything susah ok. Pelajaran, how to cope with it dah satu hal. Exam lama gila mcm setahun tu lg satu hal. Dah tak boleh enjoy like I did last year dah. 

In fact, I think tahun lps yg honeymoon year walaupun ada PMR. I didn't feel the pressure like I feel now. Not just that, my life gets tougher day by day. My two elder sisters duduk jauh for work & further study, mumsy makin busy with work, friendship kdg kdg haywire jugak. Sometimes I feel like I can't cope with this anymore. But still, live goes on. 

I really hope the rest of the year will go well. No stress, boleh? I have zero happy memories in 2013 so far. Not my year lah, I guess. Ok then, see you again very soon inshaAllah hehe xx