#TGIF: Begin Again

Happy new year! I skipped a week of TGIF, just to have a little break from season 1 (lol), before continuing with a long stretch of 51 Fridays. It's fun to treat this TGIF series like a TV show. Making it into a fun project, instead of a homework I have to complete weekly. I will go back to the whole reason why I started this TGIF in the first place, which was to improve my writing skills. I am trying to write in different ways and forms of writings; stories, reflections, poems. There are a lot more forms and styles I do want to explore but for now, I will stick to my own voice.

My consistency had a ripple effect, even when I don't share my postings each week on my socials, I think the guaranteed weekly postings became like an airtime that usual readers would tune in, automatically. Just know that I see you, through the viewer tally that spike up every Friday and it makes my heart very happy and I feel heard.

So….with new year here, I took some time to think of how I want to approach my goals and resolutions. New year will always come with this big ambition and hope -- that we want to be transformed and our lives will become exponentially better. But the truth is, the question lies within ourselves. Are we ready to take that leap? To do the difficult, to challenge ourselves, break out of our habits that kept us stuck at the same place?

Truthfully, I have no new big goals this year. I plan my life by the month, week and by the day anyway. I just want to live meaningfully. My plans continue from 2025, the same goals. The only thing that will change will be the how so I can (hopefully) achieve them. I always think this - it's not that my dream is too big, but I was too scared, to comfortable being safe. Because staying safe and stagnant is easy. Hopefully that will change this year.

But mainly, what I do hope to be this year, is to not put too much pressure on myself. I've shared how I like my life planned to a T, I like structure and while I still and will always believe structure is important, I would like more spontaneity in my life. That childlike wonder, innocence and carefree-ness I have lost somewhere while navigating adulthood.

If you know me for a long time, you would know how I am - I have always known to act older than my age since high school. Life happened and I was forced to grow up way too soon. I never got to be carefree, I was always careful. I never allowed myself to be mindless, I was always mindful. I need to let go of the tight grip I have on myself, and just let myself…..be.

In 2026, I hope to learn to let myself just live. One day at a time, have fun and not worry way too much. Don't take things too seriously, especially if it would not even matter in a month. It's not worth stressing over. Learn to balance, because hey - this is my final year in my 20s. I won't get to say that word anymore. I would be past my 20s after this year, so why not live a little?